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Now in that time when Thaddeus of the Stones and his Fellowship had crafted the Rescue Rangers and Canon the world had grown to love the period of day that parted to become the Disney Afternoon. Though soon the Rangers were to join that period of chronography the crafting of their world had been very long and consuming. The Rangers did indeed meet the approval of Ceo, and Thaddeus of the Stones did make his mark on their Sheets of Modeling. That was in the Third Month of the year Humans called Nineteen-Hundred and Eighty-Eight.
Massive in scope was the World that Disney had crafted, and Ceo, as long as his light was still bright over Eisnergard, did but add many houses of entertainment to the Empire of King Mickey. Over far reaches of the vast oceans did the crafting of the story of the Rescue Rangers transpire, for there in the Land of the Rising Sun did pen and brush meet paper and cell, and only once did these works arrive in Stu Dio were the tales of the Rangers in readiness to be told.
“Let us now bring the Rescue Rangers into the Mortal World,” said Ceo in happiness, for he had played a part in their creation, and was ready once more to prove the righteousness of his ways.
“Yes,” replied Thaddeus of the Stones, “Let the gates of the Disney Afternoon open for our Rangers, for much joy have I in them, and it is my wish that people should share in it.”
“Aye,” said Ceo, eyeing Thaddeus, “great is my pleasure at my Rangers. I shall therefore release them first upon the Channel of Disney, as it is just that such greatness should be shared first with those whom have laid their loyalty before Disney, at extra fee of course.”
At this Thaddeus and The Mouse did exchange glances, for in that time the Channel of Disney had not yet entered the realm of Basic Cable, and in that time was available only at great cost to those whom sought it. And troubled were they both greatly, for it was the second decision that Ceo had made concerning the Rescue Rangers that did confuse them.
Yet it was not the place of Thaddeus to question Ceo, and Lord Mickey did not question him, and it was done as was commanded in that time and that place. The tower of Eisnergard did shine with much splendor and judiciousness in those times, and many are those now whom wonder after those times and beg for their return.
It was upon the Fifth Day of the Third Month of the year that Man has named Nineteen-Hundred and Eighty-Nine, a cold and dreary month by all remembrances, that the Rescue Rangers first appeared out of Canon there on the Channel of Disney for the pleasure of viewing by many. And so it is from that date that the First Age of the Rangerdom is measured, and though this was to prove to be seen as the shortest age of the Rescue Rangers, it was the one in which their power was greatest. For new in the eyes of Man they were in those times, and each new yarn that was told of their travels did loom that much larger in the eyes of the youths whom saw their deeds portrayed.
Only in the time of the First Age of the Rangerdom could one anticipate the coming of the Rangers out of Canon, for only the tales that did but carry forth from that place entered into Truth. Yet in ages after many would be the questions raised out of these times, and ever after would there be those whom would ask, “Did this rise out of Canon, or has it another source?” yet in these times this was part of a future viewed only at best through a glass and darkly.
In this First Age of the Rangerdom, as we have said, did the Ranger first rise out of Canon on the Channel of Disney. Yet, before that year had passed the plan laid down by Ceo was revealed. For forth from Eisnergard came the command to open the Gates of the Disney Afternoon and let the tales of the Rescue Rangers find a Slot of Time and there settle. For now all of those in Lord Disney’s City of Stu Dio did but say, “Ah! For our Lord Ceo has but made a small name for the Rangers first on our own Channel of Disney, so that others could learn of their coming! In this way he has brought up much rumor and gossip at their name, so that much greater will be those who view them as they come out of Canon upon that share of the afternoon which does belong to Disney!”
For some though these words did ring hollow, for even in that time there were many who said unto themselves, “Why did Ceo not place the Rangers amongst the Disney Afternoon at the beginning? Lo, for it is for there for which they were designed, and from there that the multitudes can find happiness in them! Did not placing them on the Channel of Disney but tarry them from selling the Cereals of Breakfasting and the Meals of Happiness?”
Yet these voices were silent unto all but themselves, for even as this did occur had the world of The Little Mermaid been opened and made much profit for Ceo. As it was now the world of the Beauty and The Beast was being laid down, and great too were the riches that world would generate. So potent was the power of Ceo in those times that none were there who questioned him…
So it was that even in doubt the world of the Rescue Rangers did transpose itself into that part of the Afternoon owned by Disney. Here it did settle among the world of the Tales of the Ducks, and the world populated by the mythical Bears of Gummi, each of which in there own right were deserving of their own archives and histories. Soon to join them there were the stories laid down concerning the Spinning of Tales, and the legends surrounding the famed Darkwing Duck, a world to whom Thaddeus of the Stones had also been a founder. Yet, the stories of these worlds do not lie here, and so we linger over them not.
Now it was that the comings of the Rangers out of Canon were in The First Age of the Rangerdom to numbered sixty and five, no more and no less, as was pre-ordained by Ceo. Divided each of these comings were into seasons of that age, and each of these seasons bore testimony to the greatness of the Rangers in those days.
Folly it would be to attempt to name and put words to all of the adventurers that Chip, Dale, Monterey, Zipper and Gadget had in those days, for all of their five and sixty tellings were of great importance, and each in their own revealing would make a book of much duration. There are other Sacred Blueprints laid down where these are best accounted, so the Rangerillion bows instead to those sources.
In the Copyrighted Shield of The Rangers there were set three jewels of great beauty and power. Each was set upon that seal as token of a virtue of the Rangers in their duties. Yet each in time came to have other meaning, a meaning in regard to the passage of the First Age of the Rangerdom as the Rangers came out of Canon. In the passing of those days the jewels were used to represent the seasons of that age, and many are there now who have taken up that shield as their own standard.
The first great jewel in the shield of the Rangers was The Red R, and to the Rangers it meant duty and bravery, but to many it came to represent the fire that they felt within them upon first viewing the Rangers in that season, for quickly then they were amazed by these few creations and their daring-do.
Of the adventurers of the Rescue Rangers that did but transpire in this season there are many which have been told and re-told, and all but a few won the Rangers great fame. For in this time the Rangers did meet the Pi-Rats, those whom commit acts of piracy under the seas, for swarthy fellows were these whom did make their home in a vast human ship that was there entombed under the waves!
In that season did Zipper but prove himself worthy in the eyes of the Queen of the Bees, that she in her sovereign grace did but have need of the Rangers, and he had but done his best on her behalf. Here too did Monterey show his lineage, for it was shown that Charles the Endless was his sire, and great was that mouse in age and strength, if he was thick in mind as ponderous stone.
In this season Gadget displayed in much modesty her brilliance, for she was able to craft a vehicle that did give slip to the surly bonds of Earth from a humble receptacle of refuse. Measured too were the adventurers of the Rangers beyond our own small sphere, for Dale was beset besides himself as he did make known the existence of the world of Fleeblebrox and those whom dwell there in that world apart.
Yet in the eyes of many the greatest story to come of that age was that of Tammy the Squirrelmaiden and her sister, Bink the Adorable. For she, upon being once saved by Chip did fall for his charms, and at once set out to win his heart. Yet, she was a child and he refused her, driving her to much weeping. In her heart she blamed the Lady of the Workshop, and set herself to proving her powers to him, yet this resulted in her capture again, and that of her sister as well.
Coming to the rescue of the maiden Chip and Dale found themselves arrayed in the garments of ladies, and heavy was the embarrassment of Chip, though Dale seemed fine with it.
Upon her rescue it was for Tammy to admit her envy. In that time she did bestow a new name upon Chip, that of Chipper, and many are those who still call to him in that name, though he rejected it then. Though many were the flaws of Tammy these were mostly from the passions of an adolescent, and were forgivable in light of her admissions.
Lo, for though small was the part of Tammy many are those whom have professed their love for her in later ages, yet this was her one coming forth from Canon.
Thus was the first season of the Rangers, the one marked by The Red R, and it did last from Fifth Day of the Third Month to the time of the Twenty First Day of the Fifth Month of the year named by humans as Nineteen Hundred and Eighty Nine. And large was the impression it made upon the human world. Yet more was to follow, and greater still adventures awaited the Rangers.
As we have said, in the Mortal World the crafting of the story of the Rangers did consume multiple lands and Houses of Production that Ceo had brought under the control of the Empire of King Mickey. Perhaps then that is why the story of the Rangers did not match the timing that they came out of Canon, for even though the first time that Chip and Dale came to the rescue was perceived by them as first, it did not come to the Mortal Lands until the Fifteenth Day of the Ninth Month of the same year.
Thus was the confusion between the Date of Production, the Numbering of the Stories, and The Date of Airing of the tales of the Rescue Rangers. Much has been the wailing and gnashing of teeth this has caused among the Rangerphiles in the following ages.
It was on that date that the Mortal World was first told the story of how the Rangers came be, and the story “To the Rescue”, revealed in that second season on the First Age of the Rangerdom, gave the small ones who gazed upon the Disney Afternoon many ideas and set notions in their minds.
Much was the rejoicing in the World of Disney, for now the Rangers had taken their rightful place in the time of the Disney Afternoon!
The Second Jewel in the Copyrighted Shield of the Rangers, that being The Golden Bolt, heralded this second season. Of much beauty was the Golden Bolt, and it did represent the power of the Rangers to bring forth righteousness into the world. In ages since it has represented power, for the Season of The Golden Bolt was to be the greatest in duration and count of the tales told of the Rescue Rangers.
In that season did the Rangers truly feel the force of the villains that Thaddeus of the Stones and his Fellowship had crafted for them to test their skills against. Here they were consumed in battle with Feline the Gluttonous, whose will to gather to himself all precious things did but often come to naught due to the Rangers efforts. In the service of Feline the Gluttonous were numbered minor villains, great in patience and loyalty to their vast master, yet lacking backbone or brain of any measure.
In this Season of the Golden Bolt they too did face Nimnul the Small, a human of great intellect if dainty stature. In his measure he did afflict upon the world in this season pill bugs of great size, and many were the hubcaps of ancient makes of automobiles that were worn in that time. Nimnul the Small did also here try to bring the forces of the heavens under his sway, but foiled by the tail of Monterey was he in this endeavor. Revealed also was his sibling-son, Normie the Annoying, and great were the moans from the Mortal Lands at his coming.
Minor in time if not threat were other villains, including Marquis de Sewernose, a thespian of renown, yet set upon consuming performers. Though great was his size, strength, and intellect, it was in recounting his own pains that he was defeated in but a single night at the House of Opera.
Also of mention was Captain Fin, though born only by water heavy and unceasing was his hatred of Air Breathers and Land Walkers as he named them. Though many have called him the most threatening of all the adversaries of the Rangers many still are those whom suggest he may have been most pleasing to the taste if covered with the Sauce of the Tartars.
Yea, for it was not only enemies that the Rangers knew in the Season of the Golden Bolt, for allies too were numbered there. Greatest among these was He Who Sparks. He Who Sparks did not earn himself any great love from Chip and Dale, for they feared that his inventive ways would steal the heart of Gadget and put it beyond their reach. Yet, when the time came and Nimnul revealed himself as the mis-user of He Who Sparks did but Chip and Dale come to his aid. In the eyes of many He Who Sparks was ever after to be numbered as a Rangerfriend, yet in truth this is unknowable, for that was his one coming out from Canon.
In the hearts of many it was Foxglove the Melodious whom most of the praise was heaped upon, for the Great Wind Wahl-Eye had filled her in the time of her creation. Great in the ages after was Wahl-Eye to be called and loved by those whom remembered the tales of the Rangers, and joy and sorrow would flow out from that knowing, but that is a tale of a latter age.
Foxglove the Melodious was ranked as a familiar of Winifred, Blue Witch of the Mop. Yet hatred had Foxglove for this evil witch, for the heart of the bat was pure and filled with love. Heaping rejection upon the witchcraft of the Witch of the Mop Foxglove the Melodious did but turn to Dale for comfort and aid. Odd at first did Dale find such attention, yet warmed he to it.
Foxglove the Melodious did but give Dale a new name in that season, and to her he was now Cutey. Cast out of her closet was the Witch of the Mop, and to Foxglove her freedom restored. In the eyes of many Foxglove the Melodious was ever after to be numbered as a Rangerfriend, yet in truth this unknowable, for this was her one coming out of Canon, much to the sadness of those in later ages who offered up token of their professed love for her.
It was in truth a rarity for Chip, Dale, Monterey, Zipper, or Gadget to leave their world of Canon during these seasons, yet at times they were called forth back into the World of Disney, for growing was their notoriety. Here then they were called upon to pose for different Placing of Product. Many were the cereal boxes and toys within cereal boxes that their images were engraved upon. Too did they find themselves made up as toys for Meals of Happiness. Yet these were not the only engravings of the Rangers to exist.
In those days the Rangers were also to be found laid down in Books of the Comic, and yet more of their adventures were found there. Great were these stories as well but fewer are their recountings. Few are those now who can recall them, and much is the sadness in later ages that these were not better recorded, as they too could be seen as flowing forth from Canon, if only after a fashion.
In this Season of the Golden Bolt much was the anxiety when Gadget did but take into mind leaving the Rangers, for in their dealing with the Cola Cultists much was their suffering. Yet in the end the Rangers did emerge as a group, and much was the hinny that she did kick when the Orange Fury was about her.
It was perhaps this Orange Fury that lead to the creation of the most twisted creature of that age, for it oft said that no good can came of rage. In their time the Rangers did but travel to the Islands of Hawaii, and there was Gadget made aware of She of a Thousand Spellings. She of a Thousand Spellings was so much like Gadget in form and beauty that Chip and Dale were blinded to the difference between her and The Lady of the Workshop, much to their shame ever after. Yet much Gadget’s lesser was she, for her mind was filled with imaginings of power and might, of deviousness and debauchery. She of a Thousand Names was all that The Lady of the Workshop was not, and perhaps that is why her power grew in later ages…
Also too was the suffering of the Rangers while they dealt with the Diapers of Dirtiness, a tale so regrettable that it shall not be mentioned again in this tome.
Thus ended the Season of the Golden Bolt, on the Second Day of the Fifth Month of the year Nineteen and Ninety. Never after that date in Canon would Gadget be seen wearing a red dress, much to the regret of many in later ages.
In the Mortal World there could be found Nintendo, and mighty was the power it wielded in those days, for it crafted worlds in its own course. Nintendo did call to Ceo and say, “Shall we not have the Rescue Rangers display themselves upon the gaming world? Shall you lend us their strength, given of course that you shall receive proper royalties and fees of licensing for their use?”
And Ceo said, “Sure!” and made an appearance they did, and much was the rejoicing and eating of salty snack foods.
Greater still was the appearance of the Rangers in their fine raiment in the World of Disney in the Land of the Rising Sun, for now mortals could but place their hands upon the Rangers and receive their blessings in form of crude signature in rude albums bought in nearby stores. Great though was the effort it took to bring forth such avatars, and always sleepiness was seen in the avatar of Gadget.
So solves the great mystery.
Yet the third season now began, the Season of The Blue R. This season was to the briefest of the three, for here the Rangers were to reach the Sixty and Fifth recounting of their tales and an end to their world as prophesied by Ceo. Even as the Rangers re-entered their world dark clouds were gathering and in the distance was heard sounds of coming battle. Though they could not know the meaning of such sounds they were filled with anxiety.
The Blue R was the final season of the First Age of the Rangerdom. In the Copyrighted Shield of the Rangers it was a mark of their virtues of logic and deduction, for always they had need of these to complete the missions for which they girded themselves. Yet to those in the following ages it was a mark of sadness, for it revealed itself to be the final season that the Rangers came out from Canon.
Among the Season of the Blue R it was Zipper who did but show the greatest strength, as the Green Fly was always noted in the smallest of stature of the Rangers but the greatest of determination and of heart. Here in this season he but once contemplated leaving the Rescue Rangers, but soon upon his absence they did but beg him to come home to them. Soon after that he did find himself in ointment, a tale of some telling and remorse.
Yet, no sooner could one ask, “They shoot dogs, do they not?” did Canon open up and reveal a darkened sky, and at once Dale and Chip know that the Useless Ones had come once more. For now, on the Nineteenth Day of the Eleventh Month of the year Nineteen and Ninety, did the Siege of Canon prevail. In their hearts Chip and Dale could feel the pull of the Vaults of the Core Characters calling to them, echoing from their dark depths. For at the final tolling of the bells of The Season of the Blue R did the prophecy of the Sixty and Five come down in fullness upon that world, and it was shown true as laid down at the start of that age.
Yet at once did the others start to fade, for what was left for them if not this world? Chip and Dale did turn to them and, seeing their fear did embrace them, lending them their strength even as the Disney Vault pulled at their small spirits.
Around the Rangers and those that populated Canon rang the cries of battle, and terrible was the noise that rose there, and it spoke to pain and loss.
